I just don't get soccer

OK...I tried to watch the World Cup Final on Sunday when Italy faced France. I'm a guy that likes to watch "events" and considering the scale of the the championship of what is considered the world's game, I thought I'd tune in......and I was bored as hell.

I know that people will tell, me I don't understand it, that's why I don't enjoy soccer. Which I guess is correct. But I can't see how this game could have the huge following and passion of the people around the world.

From what I see, nothing happens. Guys run around "the pitch" for like two hours and that's it. You better not tune away, as I did to check out the Brewers, because you may miss a goal, the only goal of the game, game back like a minute later and the score was 1-1....and that was it for the game. ZZZZZZ!

Soccer fan...answer these questions for me.

1. Why in the heck do they end the game with penalty kicks? I think that is the stupidest thing ever. Play to a winner, I don't care if they have to play all night, someone will eventually score a goal to win it. Granted that could be after the rest of the players die of starvation after like 5 days, but give me a winner...at least in the World Cup Final...do your penalty kick thing for the other games.

2. Also, can't they come up with a better way than penalty kicks to decide the game if they can't play all night. I think that takes zero skill. The guy stands there, he kicks the ball, the goalie guesses which way he's gonna kick it and may get lucky if the dude misses it. I could do that for crying out loud.

3. Why dont they just stop the clock when someone gets hurt. Leave the clock running when the ball goes out of bounds and such, but if a guy is faking an injury on the ground like it seems most do. A little push makes them look like they have a broken leg. Stop the dang clock so when it hits 45 minutes..end the half..and at 90 its the end of the game.

4. There's another thing, why does the clock go up and not down like every other sport? I just dont get it.

5. Also I was glad to hear that Germany's President as they kept saying on TV attended 46 of th 64 World Cup Games over the last month. I bet they got a lot done in the country in June. Maybe next Summer George Bush could tell us he's taking June off to attend baseball games all over the country.

6. Now don't get me wrong, Soccer players are athletes and could be some of the best conditioned athletes in the world since they play the whole game with very few subs, and I guess actually attending games could be fun as long as you knew all the words to the songs and chants they do while the paint is drying on the field.

OK..It's been a long weekend I need a nap, maybe Sunday's game is being replayed on ESPN Classic....that'll put me to sleep, since I just don't understand the appeal of the sport.